Back to Basics: Divorce 101
Where to start?
You’ve heard me say it before, Coaching Can Help!
You’ve listened to your heart and used game theory to think about next steps.
So, what are those next steps?
There are three paths you can take to dissolve your marriage*:
Mediation
Arbitration
Collaborative Law
Litigation
While one game theory scenario may have included sitting around the kitchen table and amicably ending your marriage with no outside assistance, it’s not recommended. Nor likely. We are humans with emotions and emotions don’t normally make negotiations successful. Perhaps if you have no assets, liabilities, children, pets, you get the picture, maybe this will work. Maybe. But you still need to file paperwork to have a judge formally dissolve that legally binding contract, called marriage, you’re trying to dissolve. And, likely, minimize time having to be spent with your ex!
First things first: choose Representation
Understand that lawyers are not trained to be your therapist (unless, of course, they are!).
Your lawyer wants to know the facts. What are your assets, liabilities, budget, and what is your income? What are your children’s stages of growth development? If you want to talk more about coaching support for choosing Representation, schedule time HERE.
Next step: get to an agreement on the division of assets, the need and duration for spousal support, and shared custody / a residential plan for children and pets.
Getting to an financial agreement and a custody arrangement shouldn’t be too hard, right? You guessed it, coaching can help.
Then what?
Whether you actually do reach a settlement and a residential schedule around your kitchen table, or you have a drawn-out trial, what’s next is something you’re not going to want to hear. It’s “waiting”. And then some more waiting.
The proverbial ball is in the court’s court. Get what I did there?! The point? You are not officially divorced until a judge has signed your paperwork.
During this process, including the soul searching and game theory bits, brace your bank account. Divorce is expensive, emotionally and financially. The good news is, there is an incredible life waiting for you on the other side of this transition. Coaching Can Help. Schedule time HERE
*Most counties have Family Law Facilitators. They can help with the documents you will need for your Family Court process.
